Unhindered Rest

                    " They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles and soar...."
                      Today God reminded me of the importance of starting off with the right spirit. I hate to confess(as per His desire confess your sins one to another:), that I was a wreckless driver, impatient, blaming every other car that heeded the speed limit for my tardiness to class, and yet it was this very thing that caused me to lose sight of my Lord. As the day progressed, I found myself increasingly vulnerable to every situation that occurred. From feeling irritable, to over-analyzing just about every reaction and response to anything I said or did. This simple act of losing self-control and not allowing patience to have it's perfect work, caused me to be extremely introspective and an internal war took place, of which I slowly lost. That is when the Holy Spirit spoke something very clearly to my heart,  'To be one with a hardened heart is to be more aware of the natural than the spirit." Perhaps by now you are thinking that I am looking to deeply into this, but I tell you I am being brought to a greater awareness of the Lord's presence; to know that much of my day was spent focused on the external annoyance's of my flesh and not on the Lord himself, is well a huge injustice not only to myself, but everyone else around me.

            Song of Solomon depicts a story between two lovers. One filled with romance, dread, fear, reluctance, betrayal, and ultimately separation, that in turn led to a reunion of which there is no comparison. A lover pursues his love with a vengeance. He is completely taken by her beauty. And can I tell you, this woman points to all her physical flaws "Look not upon me for I am dark because of the sun hath looked upon me."

Songs of Solomon states that she was so busy attending other's vineyards-1:6- that she was not ready for her lover to enjoy himself in the work of her hand. The story weaves itself in and out of her unpreparedness. From the foxes in her vineyard that were spoiling the vine(2:15), to not being ready at night for his visit to her quarters(5:2),  there is an overriding theme in this lovely paradox of true Love and pursuit, one of which resonates throughout, the theme that despite her lack of sensitivity,  her Lover continues to seek after her with such vigor. But she, much like ourselves, chooses her comfort over his call. How often we get in the way of our Lord's voice. How is it we can be sensitive to his voice, when we are so occupied with ourselves? It was not till he hid himself for a moment and left her that she realized the absence of his precious presence was to much to bare. "I opened to my beloved, but my beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone: my soul failed when he spake: I sought him, but could not find him, I called him, but he gave me no answer."(5:6)

              I see this as a picture of one who has known the sweet presence of our Lord but as time went on, became all to concerned with the natural substance of their life, it could be a career, schedule, relationships, all of which slowly takes ones eyes off of his face and onto the affairs of this life-the hardness of heart. As I stated earlier, my day unfolded with the focus being on everything that was around me. I had not allowed time to center my focus around my King and before I knew it a snowball effect of irritations and unrestrained attitude surfaced. Whoa, c'mon Isabel, seriously, you were just annoyed, it happens to anyone. Well let's examine the situation closely. Say, let's just say, I chose to ignore this issue of impatience and assume it would resolve itself. I don't go and discuss it with the Lord or allow him show me what went wrong. It is almost assumed it would happen again. Again I find that I am running late, driving way to fast,which is unacceptable, the worship of God is to be done in everything we do,(we'll discuss that at a later point in time), and I drive beyond the speed limit, which in turn causes me to be pulled over by the police to which consequence in a fat fine. I then end up being an hour late to class, in which I become completely overwhelmed, and at best an offense may stir up in my heart. I might say something like" God why did you let that happen?" As the day progresses, perhaps the Holy Spirit is longing for my attention, but all I can think on is my huge fine. He continues to tug at my heart. The people in front of me in the checkout line are completely irritating me due to their obnoxious attitude(because at this point my sense to the natural realm is heightened). I am to busy being irritated with them to hear the Lord whisper to me " Share my love with them". This my friend is how one unchecked attitude can heap all the more awful consequences. And ultimately losing consciousness and awareness of his voice and presence.

OK, so this is just an example of what might happen. However it's not far from what has been happening the past few days. I have had many run-ins with the attitudes of my heart.

What then remedies this? Well of course I would not just present the problem without offering a solution. Let us take a look to see what the young woman did when her Lover pulled away.

In the following verses(5:7-8) the young woman becomes "lovesick". Wikipedia states that to be lovesick is: In love, or missing the person one loves, so much that one is unable to act normally.

This is true of myself. I begin to miss his presence so much that I simply do not act normal. I become so self focused, insecure, unable to move at the sound of his voice. And yet perhaps for many of you this how your days play out, You find that comparing yourself to others, constant introspection has become a norm. You let the situations of this life truly affect you and yet the Lord said, " I have come that you might have life and Life more Abundant. He has called us to be overcomers in every facet of our livelihood and that includes the attitudes of our hearts.

"From the time I wake to the time I lay my head I want to pursue after the Lover of my soul and never let him go."

There is a shift in the love story. The young woman finds her self seeking after her beloved. Where most of this tale generates around the pervading truth that the Lover pursues and woos her with such sweet beckoning, at the absence of his presence she becomes lovesick, or better yet obsessed with the thought of him. As a result, she pursues hard after him. I believe that is what the Lord does in our lives. He gives us such a sweet sense of his presence that we begin to realize what brings him pleasure and what tends to cause us to lose sight of him. Herein lies the solution to losing sight of that which truly matters. Seek him. "Come to me all who labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest."(matt11:28)

"Rest" is anapauo which means "to refresh, rest up," but also "to cease from labor."

The burdens of this life are not meant for you to bare alone. God desires to be in the intricate places of your being. Allow him to invade you and comfort you. Maybe it's late in the day and you have already started off with allowing the affairs of this life to entangle you. Stop just for a few moments and concentrate yourself on Him who lives within, lay it down before him. Be honest with him and release it all. What is it that at this very moment has your attention, could it be everything around you has you captivated or can you say like the young woman in the story, "I found him whom my soul loves I held him, and would not let him go."

In this life, a daily giving over to the Lord of absolutely everything, from obscure thoughts to heart issues, must transpire. Make it your highest attainment to have unhindered communion. What does that look like? Well in the midst of my day, I simply breathed a word of prayer and asked the Lord to cause me to be sensitive to him again. Suddenly, in the middle of class, I became increasingly aware of his delight in me and all those other opposing thoughts faded in the light of this one truth.

You see when you go to him, the first truth he places before you is-you are his delight. And once this has become a pervading force within you nothing will detour you from seeking him daily.

The Lord longs for a place within us to call home. And the more we understand he is a resident of our hearts, the more our highest pursuit will forever be the construction of his dwelling place within our souls. Our bodies should be a place where the Holy Spirit can be at rest. "Thus saith the Lord the Heaven is my throne, and the earth is my footstool: where is the house that ye build unto me? and where is the place of my rest?(Isaiah 66) He is seeking for open hearts that will allow him to get at those foxes that spoil the vine. Believe this, there is no greater joy than being at rest with Him and allowing him to be at rest in you. The best relationships always consist of one thing, a total understanding of the other person's heart and there is an ease that accompanies, thus there is a rest in this persons presence. Notwithstanding, the same can be said of our relationship with Christ.

My prayer is that the next time you are tempted to "deal with something" in your own understanding that you don't, that you acknowledge him in every way possible, in all you say or do, and watch as life just happens. He will direct your path. It is his promise. May your relationship with this Divine King be one of relentless pursuit and complete union of his mind and will with yours.

cheers and Gb,

isa

A Divine Muse : Obsession

Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore, I have set my face like a stone, (Flint)  determined to do his will. And I know that I will not be put to shame. Isaiah 50:7 NLT

I have titled my blog "My Magnificent Obsession because everything I do  is directly connected to God. Every decision, like who I spend my time with, or what I decide to wear, flows out of my relationship with him.
  Within us is this desire to fixate ourselves on something or someone. Whether you admit it or not, you, my friend, have an obsession. It's impossible not to take note of this simple fact!  Running from rehab to rehab, in and out of social circles, and climbing certain spectrums of hum drum, many live in denial  wrapping themselves around what would appear to satisfy.
    Obsession or addiction takes on many forms. I am quite familiar with the life of an addict. Much of my life, relationships and drugs, to dreams and self-image all became a part of my whirlwind, chain of vices . As a girl, I always dreamed of being a world renowned singer. I remember falling asleep to images of myself singing in front of thousands of people. This slowly became one of my many obsessions, eventually culminating in my move to New York City, where I would come to the end of myself and the beginning of a lifelong relationship with Jesus.  Along with the desire for fame came the never-ending cycle of relationships. My list of vices goes on, from my fascination to hip-hop culture, to the clamoring after perfecting my physical appearance, yet nothing ever satisfied this  art of compulsive behavior  I had created for myself. That is when  Jesus walked into my self-delusioned world and  completely re-wired my thinking.
 It is  better still to say that He had always been there, except for far too long I chose to ignore his calling. This Man; The Sweetest of Lovers, The Sweetest of Names, The Name that is above every Name. One that has now become my Divine Muse. His name: Jesus Christ. The savory breathtaking title of One who has finally taken his rightful place within me.
     I could not be more satisfied than I now am.  Despite his love causing wars within me-my imperfection vs. his completeness-I am anchored in his love. He is the center of my all. A jealous Lover is He indeed.
    This same passionate call is for the masses. In particular, His foreboding drips from his lips calling you, "Come and Let me become your Obsession."
       Everything about you will be transformed as you wrap your thoughts, heart, soul, and mind
around His person and presence. Hungry for more, read his love letter to you found in the Word, also known as the Bible. There you will find that this same God that I have become so enraptured by is unequivocally obsessed with you, His creation.  At the moment, I hear my Divine Obsession drawing me to speak with  Him.
cheers and Gb as you begin to discover this Divine Muse.
isa

Northern Lights, God's Tapestry. Alberta, Canada

I’m running through the gates of love, as fast as I can

I can’t wait to see You cuz I’m a desperate man

You made the light and sent it down

to show us who You are

Now It’s bursting out my heart

My desire is burning like a million stars

And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

I’d be nothing without You, yeah I would die

If I didn’t have Your hand if I couldn’t look into Your eyes

Jesus if Your love’s the fuel then I’m the desperate flame

That’s screaming out Your name

My desire is burning like a million stars

And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

My desire, is burning with the fire You sparked

And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

This is glory rising, over a new horizon

I See Your love, I feel Your smile

You're in my heart and I will run with all I have to You

My desire is burning like a million stars

And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

My desire, is burning with the fire You sparked

And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

I'm reaching out for You

I'm reaching out for You, You, You

Song: Desire Artist:(Fellow Obsessee:) Phil Wickham

Something Of Significance

The presence of God...
immeasurable depths of love drip  from wounds so deep that from the beginning of time his heart which beckoned mine beats with longing for companionship with his creation.  Desperate was his passion that he would  bleed for this. From the earth for generations his blood cries out. How can one resist such a call? This Call  consistently triumphs over every sin and every failed attempt  to do anything worth anything at all. It triumphs over every lie and every rejection. His love continues to Cry out to the hardest of hearts. His message; Simple. "Come to me, let me love you that you might in turn know me and love me ."..And this is the message not that we loved him but that he first loved us..."
  Such  sweet candor ."How I long for you to know how rare a treasure you are, my choicest possession. You are mine I have bought you with the highest of price"..Isaiah 43:1 How far superior are his thoughts towards us than that of our daily intake of media and culture which tells us we can only be as valuable as the next paycheck that comes in. I know of a miracle worker who would beg to differ not a penny to his name yet his very shadow and words alone caused miracles all around him. the lame walked and countless others were saved from incurable diseases. Indeed in this Peculiar kingdom the least shall always be the greatest. And the Last shall be first.

My week has been one of highs and lows surrounded by the echo of His immovable anchor. Such doubts I had not known before threatened to overtake me when being challenged by popular belief to be anyone of caliber there must be some sort of degree attached to my name. Thankfully my Lord reminded me that truly I have not been cut from the same cloth as most and mine is a tale of unique quality as is yours my friend.
 Character measured in success alone is not in the least an accurate account. I have met men with millions attached to their names and yet to define them by this alone would only allow for a single dimension to be exposed. While the rest of their person is one of fathomless hollowed attempts in search of significance these types endlessly find themselves searching and  latching on to the nearest prey for their satisfaction. Hoping the next dream or person will fulfill their otherwise meaningless pitiful shallow lives. I have witnessed this countless of times. What then is it to be a person of  true relevance or merit?

Significance.such a powerful word yet so many fall so short of its real meaning giving in to a mediocre existence. Not i. i refuse.

In class last week, one of my professors began  his lesson with a story. He told of how he was sitting in a  first class flight from Australia to la. The flight prior to this was next to a family with an incessant gift of gab. At last in this next flight professor would attempt to get some much needed  rest after a long series of approx.  fifty or so teachings within the span of 3 weeks .  As he sat quietly meditating on the American newspaper before him, the man next to him began to peer over his shoulder glancing at an article that caught his attention. Needless to say the professor's idea of a quiet ride was suddenly halted and he spent the next hours discussing what should "never be discussed with a stranger" politics and religion. Little did he know this man was the vice president of a very prominent adult magazine. Long story short at the end of their conversation my professor concluded and ended with this statement "I know what the problem with you is" completely taken aback,  the man replied  " Ok take your best shot"  ...To which he responded "you sir do not know what it means to lead a significant life". This mans face went ashen and for a moment silence hung in the air between them. With that the man answered " It's as though you have been reading my mail or something,  Yes I  am a VP of  a successful multi- million dollar organization and yet I go home every night not feeling like I am doing much of anything of real importance or meaning. My professor knew this had been a divine appointment from the Lord. The man then proceeded to tell him that he was taking college courses in order to become a motivational speaker...When He  asked my professor what his line of work was he proceeded to tell him with excitement " I happen to be just that a motivational speaker!!" When the  flight landed the man stood to grab his briefcase from the overhead bin , then pausing for a moment he spoke" I would like to invite you to one of my staff meetings sometime to speak to the rest of my board members. Just like that the  professor was given this man's business card ; the key to speak life to an otherwise dead and vapid group of individuals.

Here was a man whose  whole existence centered around himself and yet within him was the desire to lead a life of prestige and true influence. In most minds today he would appear to have it all together perhaps inspiring others but inside he had an insatiable  desire for more just like  the next man. Deep within the human race is the cry for meaning and purpose. How easily society perpetuates this idea which has long been proven dead and unrealistic.  The idea that to achieve your highest good is what will satisy.  If it were that simple then why are millions of "worldly successful" individuals resorting to suicide.

Wikipedia statistics show : Current suicide rates for every age group between 25 and 84 have increased. The most significant increases occurred in individuals aged 25 to 34 (12.3 in 2006 to 13.0 in 2007), 45 to 54 (17.2 to 17.7), and 55 to 64 (14.5 to 15.5). The rate of 17.7 for 45- to 54-year-olds is the highest for any age group in the country, while the rate for 55- to 64-year-olds showed the greatest increase from the previous year. Every 15 minutes someone dies by suicide. It remains the 11th leading cause of death in this country. Though suicide attempts are not reported, it is estimated that close to one million people make a suicide attempt each year. 


Or why is it almost every year without fail some tragedy befalls a famed celebrity such as drug overdose abuse incarceration alcholism? If these indeed have obtained the highest good why then are they falling in the same traps men have fell into for generations. Success indeed found often leads to a grave aftermath. Self leads only to internalization which causes the harshest of inceptions. Drowning oneself in the escape of pleasure  has become a byproduct of selfishly living for ones own gain.  Fleeting moments that can have lasting and  permanent damage.

Alexander the Great understood this all to well. He has quickly become one of my favorite historical characters of all time. What fascinates me most is his personal life. What most men would consider that of greatest importance "a picture of perfection". Where much of our culture and even language stems from this great Grecian warrior, if looked at closely led a life of tragical consequence. This self absorbed power hungry man possessed all earthly goods yet nothing could satisfy his longing soul. "When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer." Whether true a quote or not one thing can be certain as per further study into this historical giants' life. He was never satisfied. How could he be if continue to seek after more he did?
 Alexander, by the age of thirty, was the creator of one of the largest empires in ancient history. Born in Pella in 356 BC, Alexander was tutored by the famed philosopher Aristotle. In 336 BC he inherited his father's throne as Philip II was assassinated. His spread of Greek influence also known as Hellenistic civilization is still found dripping within the pages of our current society. This man became the plumb line for a entirely new World view. Success reeked from his pores. " He became the measure against which military officials, even to this day, compare themselves . Military academies throughout the world still teach his conquests and exploits."

His legacy still lives on and is evident in much of our culture today. Considered by many in his time a deity Alexander was the epitome of excellence yet his personal life was one of drunken rages and broken relationships. With all he achieved he could not create a lasting empire and  could not create an heir. He died childless and alone. There are many speculations as to how he died some said it was foul play by those closest to him other theories imply death by overdose of medication or a rapid decline of health due to heavy drinking and frivolous living after the death of a close friend. Alexander died at the ripe age of 32.  A figure that was heralded for his almost unearthly and unrestrained conquests. Still He  could not tame his own soul. I wonder if before he died truly had he  felt accomplished and fulfilled. This question perhaps will  remain a mystery. Yet Alexander's life still rings out the forbearance of a man desirous of greatness and yet could not harness is own wild affections which led to the fall of this great empire. Can importance be found in the conquering of nations for the sake of one's own will and   yet the control over one's soul remain  unattained. To die young and alone with paranoia knocking within his heart is hardly an achieved matter.

Perhaps Alexander died of a broken heart. After the death of his closest confidant his mental and physical health quickly fell and his vicarious ways seemed to get the best of him. It is here that I come to the culmination with all that he had gained he lost to the game of life as death wrapped its grip around this once accomplished man. I conclude that even Alexander the greatest among men could not defeat his strongest enemy. Himself. His loneliness. His angst. His unmet desire of conquering all the world. His grieved heart in the end caused his downfall . Much like many who succeeded Alexander would  find  out " living for life alone  could never be enough.Significance my friend is not found in the next grandiose applaud of eminence or accomplishment but alone is found in the ultimate sacrifice. That God himself would leave perfection to receive to himself imperfect beings and committing his very life to do so. He endured such  excruciating pain simply because we are of that much matter and value to him. This absoluteness leaves me breathless. No man that ever lived  could claim such a persuasion. How can we ignore this intrinsic reality?  You mean more to my Lord than his very existence.
          What greater love can be found than a man lay down his life for his friend. John 15:13. If this truth could etch itself into our very soul we will reach limitless heights. Our lives will begin to blossom with the pervading force of love.  Driven by love to love.
Why is we continue attempting the climb  of the highest of mountains in search of influential love when love has already overcome the greatest of enemies to find us? Love has  come down through the person of Jesus Christ and reaching out  his hand toward you the fragmented soul, he gently invites you to partake of his splendor. This is true significance that the God of this universe is mindful of you.

I am a true testament to this love . I have been so transformed by it.

This past year after graduating from school has been one of tragedy and triumph. In many ways  I was left with a hurt sodden soul.  Almost immediately after school I was plunged into a youth ministry. Bits and pieces of me was  being given out to heal the lives of other young broken people. And yet as I shared this gospel truth with these hungry lives still within my heart was a  bleeding wound which stemmed deep from childhood. It had only  just resurfaced.  
        I had walked with the Lord for a number of years and yet the vicious cycle of rise and fall had begun to take its toll. Still  I set out to see others become free. My personal conquests of leading people to him  became my solace. I remained pining after significance which seemed to be just beyond my reach. Why was I still so clouded ?  Why had my vision of  true worth become so hazy. Had I not been going about the Lord's work?  Was that not enough? Within me was this clamor to understand my distinctive caliber. For so long I had poured my self into assisting others, loving others ,giving myself for others,  yet I  had not even begun to tap into the real meaning of this divine relationship with my Creator. He ached with desire to pour out his  love but I had been to busy to sit and receive that "Good thing". Being slow to learn it was not till I had become totally bankrupt and bare before him, not hiding behind my "good deeds", that he was allowed to pour upon me such unexpected graces and beauty.
      To describe the exchange that has begun within me cannot properly be exercised or expressed in the English language. However momentous steps of achievement in my life have been taken simply  by the powerful alluring presence of Almighty powerful God. He invaded me with himself and I cannot begin to express to you how significant I already realize my self to be. Perhaps by man's standards and perhaps my very own I have not done much to tell of.  However just a few moments in the presence of my King and suddenly I have come to grips with just how much we his created beings  are  worth. His word which has arrested my thoughts speak of great inherited wealth.  He has inscribed  us on the palms of his  hands. How great is his love towards us. We can only know the value of humanity in light of the cross, And we  can never realize the true value of the cross till we realize the true value of humankind.
       Success is not found in the millions of people I hope to one day meet and lead to his feet. Or  all the ground I will possess for his kingdom. Its not found in the height of mans wisdom or the depths of human honor. It could not be procured by the greatest of conquests or the attainment of glory. Success alone is  found in one person and one simple true story. That of a King who laid down His crown. Stepped out in our weakness and with great resound  came and found us. He desired to obtain and posses the impossible. The wayward heart of another which refused to be tamed. No other befores him had ever attempted or could  others boast in such terrain. As that which was conquered through the defeat of death and the grave. With blood on his brow and your face on his mind. He spread his arms wide to receive mankind. He alone does boast such a glorious feat. Of that which required the nailing to a cross of his hands and feet. With just three words he defeated the greatest of foes." It is finished" he gasped and with that he would go. His tattered torn body lay limp on that tree as onlookers gawked and others agreed surely this was the King of the Jews. Surely he died in vain they proposed. Little could they  know that just before them was the greatest of Heroes. Yes in man's eyes his was a story of sad defeat. but it did not end there this tale of old . Up from the grave three days later he arose. The veil of sin which kept our hearts at bay had now been broken and  Man's redemption was paid. The sacrifice now made,  Satisfied he laid the foundation for the untameable heart to be harnessed by him. His greatest desire from within was to be aquainted with his creation and for us to know him. His death and ressurection now opened wide for the impossible to begin. Relationship with the divine Trinity is what we can boast in. Here I stand in knowlegde of His pursuit. He pursues with a vengence the heart of man. To be completely conquered by his passionate love. This is the greatest desire from He who is above. How can you dear friend doubt your worth ?  All of this was done to obtain your affection. He did this for you. thus he has become my maginificent obsession. I will not stop and cannot stop I must not stop till all come to the saving knowledge of my Lord Jesus Christ. The one who has died and lives again. He dwells within. He is inside of my very being. By  his Holy Spirit I will continue singing this song of everlasting wonder and truth that the same God inside of me Longs to be inside of you.


 Significant one that you are receive the greatest of conquests as you surrender to the greatest of conquistadors of all time.

I started school last week and already have been so rewarded by my simple obedience in coming here. once again i am being inspired by the beautiful Holy Spirit to do and be everything he has planned for me. i continue to covet your prayers and support as i know as well as paul knew its the prayers of the saints that will continue to strengthen me. Love and blessings. isa